You Don’t Have to Be a Hot Girl (but you probably are one, you just don’t realise it)
Two girls walked onto my bus the other day and I thought about how pretty they were. I wondered if I could pull off a haircut as short as the blonde girl, and the redhead had insanely long eyelashes. A few minutes later I overheard them both discussing their body image issues; a self-aware discussion of the frivolity of physical appearance and the simultaneous weight it carries as a young woman navigating the modern world.
What do we do when we’re not the best (or when we don’t think we are)?
I hear all the time that social media is a breeding ground for insecurity and that comparison is toxic, but what’s the solution?
As a woman and as an artist, it’s easy to get disheartened by the highlights of others. In a world where we are taught to compete, it’s no wonder we feel defeated when someone else achieves something; whether it’s a Grammy or a good boob job. You may think that’s a strange, irrelevant comparison, but since women are conditioned to see their looks as their most valuable asset (incorrect), fitting the beauty standard is deemed a “win” in society’s books. Cosmetic procedures are on the rise and women’s rights are on the chopping block and as a female artist, there’s a lot to take in and a lot to express.
To be honest, I have often felt like, in order to succeed in gaining a following online or respect for my art in real life, I have to be good-looking and my art has to be perfect. And this doesn’t even come from my own insecurity, it’s the perfectly-marketable-pop-princess, muse-turned-artist box that all creative women are pushed into. I try to film in good lighting and wear flattering clothes and I always wear makeup when performing but none of that actually matters. None of that makes me a better artist.
There is beauty in imperfection. I wish I could go back and tell those girls on the bus that (-It’s something I have to remind myself too, sometimes). I would tell them that their conversation was eloquent and intelligent and that that is so much more important than the way they look. I would tell them how lucky they are to have a friendship where those conversations are possible. I would also tell them that everything that makes them feel “different” is exactly what makes them so cool.
For my fellow artists, post, release and exhibit your imperfect works; somebody will probably adore them. For everyone else (particularly the girls); you are at your best when you are the most authentic version of yourself. Have fun with it.
xx Rose